“Anything that can be prevented, taken away, or coerced is not a person’s own—but those things that can’t be blocked are their own.” —EPICTETUS

Discover what you truly control and unlock a life of greater freedom and resilience.

3/11/20242 min read

Find What's Truly Yours: A Stoic Perspective

A Modern Translation: The things you can always control – your thoughts, beliefs, and actions – are the only things that truly belong to you.

Questions:

  • What in your life feels out of your control right now?

  • How does it feel to let go of trying to control external things?

  • Where can you focus your energy on the things you can change?

Simple Explanation: This quote highlights the Stoic focus on distinguishing between what we control and what we don't. External things like possessions, reputation, and even our bodies are impermanent and can be influenced by others. Our inner world, our choices, and our character – this where true power lies.

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Deep Dive

Epictetus stresses that freedom lies in focusing on what's within our power. This doesn't mean we accept injustice or stop striving, but we acknowledge what we can truly influence. Marcus Aurelius echoes this in Meditations: "You have power over your mind—not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength."

Seneca speaks to the resilience this mindset fosters: "What is quite unbreakable is my determination...You can threaten me, but you cannot control my will." True freedom comes from knowing that even when stripped of everything external, our core remains untouched.

This wisdom aligns with Zeno of Citium's teaching that happiness stems from living in accordance with nature – recognizing the order of the universe and focusing on what lies within our agency. Acknowledging this distinction isn't about passivity, but rather strategic action where it matters most.

Applicable Situations

  • Dealing with Loss: Job loss, the end of a relationship, or the death of a loved one can be devastating, but this concept reminds us of what remains within our control even during great sorrow.

  • Managing Anxiety: Constant worry about what others think or future events drains our energy. This perspective shifts our focus back to our present actions.

  • Goal Setting: We can't guarantee outcomes, but we can control our effort, preparation, and response to challenges.

Action Items

  • Notice & Redirect: When you feel overwhelmed, check in: Is your focus on what you control, or on uncontrollable externals?

  • Circle of Control Practice: Draw a circle. Inside, write what you control. Outside, write what you don't. Expand your inner circle through consistent action.

  • "Premeditatio Malorum": The Stoic practice of imagining negative scenarios allows us to choose how we'll respond in advance, strengthening our inner fortress.

Modern Connections

  • Viktor Frankl: His book, Man's Search for Meaning, chronicles his survival in a concentration camp. Even when stripped of everything, he found freedom in his inner world: "Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of human freedoms - to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances."

  • Nelson Mandela: Imprisoned for 27 years, Mandela maintained his dignity and unwavering spirit. His internal focus not only allowed him to endure injustice but ultimately became a powerful force for change.

  • Minimalism: The movement of shedding excess possessions aligns with the Stoic idea that true value lies within ourselves, not in external objects.

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